Love Don't Have to Hurt Read online

  I missed my long tresses, but the sophisticated look that this bob was giving me was popping. Since I got my new haircut, John has been on me like white on rice. He even allowed me to drive my own car to school for once. I guess he realized that his attempt to make me ugly failed, so he had to make up to me.

  I was sitting in the student lounge, going over some notes, while I waited for Johan to get out of class. We had a spa day planned and I couldn’t wait to get my feet messaged with hot rocks. I was jamming to Bryson Tiller’s, “Don’t”, when I felt someone take a seat at my table. Looking up, my heart melted once I saw Alex’s pretty eyes looking into mine.

  “Long time no see,” he smiled.

  “My boyfriend took me on vacation,” I lied.

  “Oh really, in the middle of a semester? That dude is bad for business,” he replied.

  “I was caught up with my work,” the lies continued to roll off of my tongue.

  “Are you going to be my date at the NFL drafts?” he asked me.

  “Didn’t you just hear me say I have a boyfriend?” I rolled my eyes.

  “How long y’all been together?”

  “Three years. Why?”

  “See, if I’ve been with you for three years, you would have at least been rocking an engagement ring by now. That nigga ain’t serious, he playing games. Since this finger right here is naked, you free game,” he said, touching my soul with his eyes.

  Those damn eyes were so damn tantalizing. Every time I looked into them, I found myself feeling some type of way. Alex had the ability to make a funny feeling arise in the pit of my stomach. Thinking back to a conversation about love that I had with my aunt Shanice, she told me about butterflies. A feeling you get every time you were around someone who captured your heart. When I was around John, I did feel a type of way, but this feeling I was getting with Alex was something different.

  “Maybe he did propose and I just didn’t accept,” I shrugged.

  “My point exactly. He ain’t the right one for you. If I would have gotten on one knee, I am willing to bet my career in the league that you would have said yes,” he smirked.

  “Oh whatever,” I rolled my eyes.

  “Listen, when I make it big, I have plans on walking away and not looking back. I would love to walk into my new life holding your hands, but that’s something only you can decide. Here’s my number in case you ever want to know how it feels to be with a real man,” he said, sliding me a business card.

  I had to chuckle at how serious Alex was about his career. He had business cards that read Alex Russo, future pro ball player. I wasn’t mad at him tho, just as he was passionate about football, I was with science. I had big plans on being a pharmaceutical scientist, so that I could discovered treatments to different illnesses.

  Just as Alex was walking away, Johan was coming to the table. She must have saw the exchange between Alex and I by the look on her face. My heart started to jump out of my chest in fear. I knew Johan and I were best friends, but I was dating her brother, and her loyalty was with him.

  “Relax MeMe, I’m not going to tell my brother,” she giggled, reading my thoughts. “I actually wish you’d leave him already,” she rolled her eyes.

  “Why?”

  “Because he ain’t shit.”

  “Yikes, such harsh words,” I laughed.

  “Seriously, John is my brother and I love him and all, but the way he treats you is terrible. I’m a woman first and there is no way in hell it’s acceptable for a man to cheat on his girl, then beat her up,” she snapped.

  Sometimes I wish I didn’t tell her everything, but I needed to talk to someone. The day aunt Shanice discovered my bruise, I wanted so badly to tell her the truth, but I ended up lying. I was so afraid of being looked at as my mother that I decided to keep my abuse a secret from everyone, except Johan. She would always encourage me to leave John, but the fear in me wouldn’t allow me to.

  “Aimesha, it’s time you start thinking about yourself. You have your whole life ahead of you. You’re still young, you don’t have to be in this abusive relationship,” she said.

  “I know,” I put my head down. I wanted to leave, but I was scared. John was so powerful with so many connections that I wouldn’t know how to get away from him. I thought about asking my aunt Shanice and Uncle Jordan for help, but deaded the thought.

  “You ready to go get pampered,” Johan smiled.

  “Yes!” I jumped up.

  I was surprised when I spent the whole day out with Johan and John didn’t blow me up. He usually called me every hour, sometimes facetiming me to see what I was up to. I guess he was really giving me my space. I shrugged as I parked my car behind his truck. When I walked inside the house, it was empty. The back door was slightly opened, so I walked over to it. Before I could greet John, I noticed he was on the phone, having a conversation with some chick. His back was towards me and he had the nerve to have the hoe on speaker. She was on the other line boasting about how she missed the good dick she would be getting while they were in Jamaica, vacationing. She even tried to be funny by asking how I was doing. I wanted to snatch the phone up and go off on her, but that would only earn me a black eye.

  Quietly walking back into the house, I made my way upstairs to our bedroom. The disrespect from John was too real, and I had to do something about it. The more I sat on the bed and thought of my way out, the more I thought about Alex. Maybe me following him when he deiced to leave wasn’t a bad idea after all. Just as I was about to pick up the phone and text him, John walked in the room. Good thing I memorized his number in my head, I thought as I quickly exited the dial pad and went to my Facebook profile.

  “Hey baby, I ain’t hear you come in,” John flopped on the bed, giving me a kiss.

  “I didn’t know you were home,” I replied, liking a few pictures Johan tagged me in.

  “How was the spa?” he asked.

  “Relaxing,” I replied.

  “Good. I have to go out of town for a few days to handle some business,” he lied through his teeth.

  “I knew he was only going to lay up with that bitch because I heard their plans. Instead of pouting or arguing, I nodded my head. To be honest, I was happy he was leaving for a few days. I would have some time to myself to sort everything out.

  “I was thinking I could go over to my aunt Shanice’s house,” I said, holding my breath.

  “That’s not a bad idea,” he replied, shocking the fuck out of me.

  He usually didn’t like me going anywhere when he went out of town. He always liked when I was home, that way he could keep better tabs on me. The fact that he was allowing me to stay at my aunt’s house let me know that ol’girl he was fucking with must have had something serious between her legs.

  “Ok, I’ll call her and let her know I’m coming,” I replied.

  In the inside, I was jumping up and down for joy, but I kept it cool on the outside.

  “Cool, now go cook your man a steak, I’m hungry as fuck,” he replied, kissing my lips.

  For some reason, his kisses didn’t feel the same. I was no longer aroused like I usually got whenever our lips connected. To into the so John wouldn’t get mad, I had to imagine he was Alex. The thought of Alex’s soft lips against mine, with his beautiful eyes piercing mine, was enough to have my panties wet. I was kissing all over John as if I was a dog in heat.

  “Damn girl, slow down,” John moaned.

  “Mm baby, sorry. I just missed you,” I lied.

  “Feed your man and I promise to dick you down proper,” he said, smacking my ass.

  Rolling my eyes, I walked to the kitchen to prepare John his steak. I made sure to drop it on the floor a few times, stomping on it with my feet, before seasoning it and putting it in the oven. I was so done with John’s ass, I just needed an opportunity to present itself, so I could leave for good.

  Chapter 28

  Alex

  While I was in conditioning, all I could think about was Aimesha’s pretty face. I
was so infatuated with her that it hurt to see her going home to another nigga. A no good one at that. I was willing to take her with me on my journey in the NFL. If that didn’t show how much I cared for her, I didn’t know what would.

  Aimesha was nothing like the other girls I had brief encounters with. Since word got around campus that I had an agent and was preparing to go pro, I was seeing more hoes than the welfare office. I already had chicks digging me, but going pro had all the hoes jocking. The crazy thing about it all is that I found myself comparing every single one of them to Aimesha. When I couldn’t find one that compared, I stayed single. It was crazy how I was being faithful to a girl who was in a relationship, but I was willing to wait. I didn’t need no bitch fucking it up for me, if she ever did decide to come around.

  “Great practice, Alex,” my agent, Rick, said.

  “Thanks man. I’m in the best shape ever.”

  “I have a strong feeling you’re going to be the Panthers first pick,” he said, causing me to smile.

  Ever since I could play ball, I dreamed of playing for the Panthers. I had a lot of family living in North Carolina, so I was already familiar with the area. The only thing that would make this great news better was if Aimesha called me and told me she was willing to come with me. It was crazy that I wanted to be with a girl I barley talked to, but when cupid hit your ass, you can’t help but answer.

  “I’m going to mail them these drills you did today. Keep up the good work, champ,” Rick said, walking to his car.

  Instead of heading home to take a shower and relax, I decided to head to my sister’s house. My niece has been begging for me to pick her up and buy her a few American Dolls. Since this would probably be my only free day, I decided to sacrifice my rest for her.

  When I arrived to my sister’s house, that familiar truck was in the driveway. I thought about leaving and coming back, but I decided to just go in and grab baby girl. Fetching her key from my key ring, I stuck my key in the lock and opened the door. What I was greeted with caused me to slam the door close. Niake was bent over on the couch, getting her back blown out by Aimesha’s so called boyfriend.

  When I stressed to Aimee that her dude was no good, it wasn’t me hating on their relationship, I was simply speaking the truth. The first time I realized Aimesha’s dude was a creep was when I saw their picture pop up on her ringing phone; she had his name saved under hubby. He was the same nigga that Niake introduced as the new guy in her life at one of my mother’s Sunday dinner. The fact that he had a girl as beautiful and smart as Aimesha and was doing her creep, pissed me off. Good guys like myself always got the short end of the stick when it came to women, while all the douche bags lucked up.

  I wanted to tell Aimesha about her so called boyfriend, but that wasn’t my place. Even though I wasn’t a corner boy, I was still a street nigga, and I abide by the codes. It would have been a hoe move on my part to tell Aimesha about her cheating boyfriend in order to get in good with her.

  I must have sat in my car for an hour before he finally decided to leave. He walked towards my car and tapped the window. I made sure my registered gun was securely in place before rolling the window down.

  “You straight?” I asked.

  “Yeah, I’m good. You straight?”

  “I’m gucci,” I replied.

  “Good, next time take your own notes in class and stop fucking with my bitch,” he spat.

  “Nah, son. I don’t know what bitch you talking about because Aimesha ain’t no bitch, she’s a woman, recognize that,” I snapped.

  “Lil nigga got balls,” he laughed.

  “Big balls too,” I smirked.

  Just because niggas from the block feared him, didn’t mean I had to. My father was one of the illest street niggas around before he died. It was his death that made me want to dream bigger than being a hustla. It was more to a black man than slanging dope, and I was going to prove that.

  “This nigga a joke. Get like me, lil nigga.”

  “Nah, I’m good son. Bust a move or get the fuck away from my car.”

  “Lil nigga got heart, you got that. The only reason I’ma leave your ass alone is because I have enough energy in me to go home and give my bitch, Aimesha, some dick,” he smirked.

  I wanted to smack that stupid look off his face, but my niece came running to my car.

  “Yay uncle, you came!” she jumped up and down.

  “You know I couldn’t forget about you baby girl,” I smiled, getting out the car to pick her up.

  I rolled my eyes when I noticed Niake leaned against John’s car with a stupid grin on her face. I couldn’t understand how she could willingly mess with another woman’s man. Shit like this I heard about in those silly ass urban books, but I had no idea there were real bitches like that in the world. Most side bitches got tired of playing second and tried to fight for the number one spot; however, my sister was perfectly fine with being a side line kept bitch. That shit disgusted me, especially since she was raising my niece. Instead of saying anything to her, I strapped my niece in the car and drove off.

  ****

  Looking over at the clock, I read it was one in the morning. I looked over at my niece and saw she was peacefully sleeping next to me. Without looking at the caller ID, I silenced the call and turned on my stomach to get some more rest before bringing Nia home to my sister, then heading to class. When the ringing of my phone wouldn’t stop, I finally answered it.

  “Hello?”

  “Alex?” the soft voice said.

  “Aimesha?” I asked, sitting up.

  “Yes, I need someone to talk to. Can you meet me somewhere?” she asked, sounding as if she had been crying.

  “I’m with my niece, but you’re more than welcome to come over,” I replied.

  “Never mind,” she said.

  “Aimesha, chill out. I’m going to text you the address and leave the door open for you.”

  “Ok,” she replied before hanging up.

  I jumped out of the bed, making sure not to wake my niece. I went to the bathroom to wash my face and brush my teeth. I walked over to the front door and unlocked it, then grabbed a blanket and laid on the couch, waiting for Aimesha to come.

  I must have fallen asleep because I felt a soft pair of hands shaking me awake. I looked up and saw Aimesha dressed down in a pair of baggy joggers, a fitted t-shirt, fuzzy pink socks, with some pink Nike sandals on her feet. She wasn’t even trying, but she looked sexy as hell.

  “What’s wrong?” I asked.

  “Everything,” she cried.

  “Shhhhh. Come here,” I reached for her and that is when I noticed a dark mark on her cheek.

  “What happened to your face?” I asked, using my phone as a flashlight.

  “Nothing,” she sobbed.

  “Is he hitting you?” I asked, clenching my jaw.

  When she put her head down, I felt my blood pressure rise. It was one thing to be cheating on her, but to put hands on her was out of line. I wanted to march down to my sister’s house and kick his ass, but I had to think rationally since I had my niece. I was so hurt watching my future wife cry. I knew he was possessive, but I had no idea that he was hitting her.

  “Come here baby,” I said, pulling her on to the couch with me.

  “Is this his first time hitting you?” I asked, bracing myself for the answer.

  “No,” she softly replied.

  “What are you going to do about it?” I asked.

  “I want to leave, but I don’t know how. He’s just so powerful out here in the streets, making it impossible for me to get away.”

  “You can always come to North Carolina.”

  “What’s in North Carolina?” she asked.

  “A new life with me. If I get drafted by the Panthers, then that’s where I plan on going.”

  “You don’t even know me to want to take me with you to another state.”

  “You don’t know me, but you’re here laying in my arms on my couch,” I replied.
/>   “Faith is crazy like that. When two people are meant to be together, they will be together regardless of how long they’ve known each other. The best relationships are the ones that you can instantly feel that it’s real,” I said.

  “What am I supposed to do, move to North Carolina with you and live with you?” she asked.

  “You can, or you can find a college to transfer to, and stay in the dorms while we get to know each other better. I’m not asking for you to jump into anything with me, I’m just asking for a chance to prove to you that I can be a better man,” I replied.

  “How can you afford this place if you can’t work?” she asked.

  “My mother owns this complex, she owns a few others too,” I replied.

  “This is a nice place,” she said, looking around my smoke grey and black living room that my mother decorated for me.

  “My mom loves decorating and flipping houses, so she set me up pretty nicely,” I replied, playing in her hair.

  “What made you want to cut your hair?” I asked.

  “You don’t even what to know,” she replied.

  “Try me.”

  “I fell asleep with gum in my hair and it got caught in it,” she hesitantly replied.

  “One thing you gotta know about me is I keep it one hundred at all times, and I expect the same. I hope you don’t think I’ma believe that bullshit ass story,” I said, calling her out on her lies.

  “He cut it,” she finally confessed.

  “Can I ask you a question?”

  “Yes,” she softly replied.

  “If he treats you so bad, why are you still with him?” I asked.

  She inhaled and exhaled before telling me the story of her mother and father. She went into details about how both her grandmothers were abused by her grandfathers and they stayed. Listening to her go on about her mother’s abuse, I realized that there was a pattern in their stories. Both of them went through the same thing with dominate males taking over their life, abusing, and cheating on them. I just prayed her outcome was different than her mother’s. When she finished opening up to me about everything, I had a new found respect for her. One would say she was dumb for staying in her fucked up situation, but that wasn’t the case. She was traumatized by her childhood, which resulted in her taking anything from John just to feel loved.